Asking what an overlanding set up costs.

[MOAK]

I’ve read various places about people asking what a camping/overlanding /expedition rig/truck camper/van cost is to put together. It always kind goes like this- “ we’ve been asked by lots of people what our set up cost “ My wife and I’ve been doing this for nearly 30 years and neither of us have ever been asked about what any of our 3 rigs cost to put together. I know I have somewhat envious relatives that would love to know, but even they don’t ask. My best friends and best relatives have never asked. Even if anyone ever did, I’d just answer, “quite a bit”. Does anyone else on here think it to be rude to ask such a question?

 

[FishinCrzy]

I've been known to make stuff up when people get too personal. The truth is sometimes optional. A good story about buying it for pennies on the dollar at a government auction should wind them up. Or, maybe winning it in a poker game?

 

[grubworm]

I wouldn't say that someone asking the cost of something is rude...its more of a cultural thing here in the US. we Americans place a value on EVERYTHING and are always asking "how much". if someone knocked on my door and wanted to know if I was interested in them mowing my property, my first response would be "how much"? I go to Burger King and they ask if I want to Super Size my meal...so then I ask "how much"? i go to Lowes to buy a new washer and they ask if I want an extended warranty. "How much"

My wife comes home and tells me about a dress she likes in the store. What is my first question? Do I care what color it is? Do I care who the designer is? Do I even care what its made out of or even what it looks like on her? No. All I want to know is "HOW MUCH"?

I saw a documentary on people's behavior and they did a thing where they showed women a pair of shoes. They would say the shoes were $20 and the women would be totally disinterested in them and not even ask any questions about them. They would show the same shoe to other women and say that they were $500 from a famous designer and the women immediately fawned all over them and was now interested in them. I guess most people will only be interested in something if they feel it is expensive and has "value". If you didn't spend a lot on it, then it isn't worth their time talking about it. Some folk ask out of genuine curiosity and sometimes people will ask how much something costs because its probably the only question they can come up with to add to the conversation.

People are weird and have misguided priorities a lot of the times and suck at communicating, but, no...I wouldn't label that as "rude".

 

[smritte]

I don't think its rude. If you ever built one you know the cost. Mostly people ask me, what will it take for me to build that. Then they either faint or they think I'm exaggerating. As it is, I'm right in the middle of a new 4Runner build. When I was shopping for it (2020 with 70k miles) my girlfriend wanted to know why I just didn't buy a new one and build that. I showed her how much all the suspension and accessories cost the previous owner. Next I commented on how much he would have saved if he didn't have to pay someone to install all that. At first she didn't believe that he spent close to 20k parts and labor within the last two years. Then we looked up all the parts and I estimated labor cost. Next she wanted to know why he didn't buy cheap parts. My response was pretty much "Buy once, Cry once" Now she understands. Oddly, after all that she still wants me to build her new Land Cruiser.

The point here is, people want to know for various reasons. Maybe their just curious or maybe they want something like that. With this hobby, I find that most people want to spend as little money as possible. They don't want a proper vehicle, they want it to look like a proper vehicle. My ex-wife would ask why I just don't buy a "new" off road vehicle that I don't have to modify my self. She never believed me on the cost and I always told her it was less than I spent.

 

[MOAK]

Interesting- when I retired I really didn’t know how to quit working so I hooked up with a high end kitchen & bath remodel/upgrade company, doing the fine finish paint work. I was rarely asked how much. The clients were more interested in my methodology, my attention to detail, which high end interior paint I’d be using, and my personal history, short version - - and, when can you start? Then they might ask, how much do you think it will be. I’d give a ballpark and get the job. If a clients first question was, how much? I’d walk away.

 

[MidOH]

Thin skin.

I could just Google your gear, then laugh at you, for paying so much.

You're really going to be miffed, when I ask you if your wife is single and available. See if she'd be interested in chopping down some Joshua trees for a nice camp fire.

 

[MOAK]

Thin skin.

I could just Google your gear, then laugh at you, for paying so much.

You're really going to be miffed, when I ask you if your wife is single and available. See if she'd be interested in chopping down some Joshua trees for a nice camp fire.

That’s exactly what I do. If a rig interests me I just look it all up.

 

[smritte]

Interesting- when I retired I really didn’t know how to quit working

Yeah huh.
My girlfriend thought me retiring would give me more time to relax. Between my off-road projects, my 3d printer and a whole white board full of ideas, I need to go back to work just to relax.

 

[ThundahBeagle]

I’ve read various places about people asking what a camping/overlanding /expedition rig/truck camper/van cost is to put together. It always kind goes like this- “ we’ve been asked by lots of people what our set up cost “ My wife and I’ve been doing this for nearly 30 years and neither of us have ever been asked about what any of our 3 rigs cost to put together. I know I have somewhat envious relatives that would love to know, but even they don’t ask. My best friends and best relatives have never asked. Even if anyone ever did, I’d just answer, “quite a bit”. Does anyone else on here think it to be rude to ask such a question?

Growing up I was always taught not to ask what other people's things cost or how much they make. I might ask, "Where did you get it?" Or how do I get one, but not the cost. It was considered uncouth to talk money.

I was in charge of a few jobs where we staffed it with a bunch of different contractors and I overheard one asking another what he was making. I put the kybosh on that right there in front of everyone. "Hey, everyone: you are all here because each of you made a deal that works for YOU. The deal is the deal. It's not your business to know what anyone else makes, this is not public sector. If you think you can do better, you should not have come, so leave now. If you want to do better on the next contract, we will negotiate it then. Anyone talking money with others gets dismissed."

It wasn't so much that it was a dark secret, but a contract between private parties is exactly that. We actually tried to be fair and almost everyone got the same $ but there were some guys who brought a little more to the table in terms of knowledge, experience, equipment, or a very level head under pressure. Anyone who brought all 4 of those attributes was compensated appropriately and I didn't need some snot-nosed kid being pissy on the job because he hasn't taken into account a 45 year old guys experience outmatches his young hot-headed attitude.

Once, I lapsed on this rule. My brother in law was in town and didn't speak English. I was waiting on a big check from a client and was sweating bullets it hadn't come yet. It finally came just in time and I got all excited and he wanted to know what I was on about and I told him (in very bad Portuguese) I'm taking everyone out to a big dinner as I opened the envelope to show him what I meant, as I wasn't sure I said it right. Man, the wife (at the time) sure called me out on it and I felt bad because I'd made him feel bad.

Seems, over time, that the etiquette of "don't talk money" has slipped away, or not been taught and passed on to newer generations.

If someone really wants to know, they can do their own research. Back in the day they would have had to check dealerships and suppliers and add it all up, but especially these days, the Google machine is available at their fingertips and there is no reason except lazynes for someone not to know what they want to know.

 

[CATCOP]

Hmmmm? Asking how much is a bit like asking how dumb are you? How vain are you? Now, that's if it big and shinny, if it's old, small and beat up, they won't ask.

Consider this; how many round trip first class tickets can I get to Paris and rental car fees, for what I paid to take motoring adventure travels.
Can I fly into more interesting areas, rent a vehicle and pack my bags for less than the cost of the Geolander?

Simply asking "what do similar rigs like this generally cost" I don't think is offensive.

 

[Mossback]

Cost probably depends on whether you are going to use the rig to get somewhere or park it at an overland convention.

 

[MOAK]

Hmmmm? Asking how much is a bit like asking how dumb are you? How vain are you? Now, that's if it big and shinny, if it's old, small and beat up, they won't ask.

Consider this; how many round trip first class tickets can I get to Paris and rental car fees, for what I paid to take motoring adventure travels.
Can I fly into more interesting areas, rent a vehicle and pack my bags for less than the cost of the Geolander?

Simply asking "what do similar rigs like this generally cost" I don't think is offensive.

I went to a family gathering the other day. One of the beer drinkers saw an overlander for sale locally. He was astonished at 134k and thought it to be an outrageous amount. I kept quiet- it’s all relative.

 

[ThundahBeagle]

I don't think its rude. If you ever built one you know the cost. Mostly people ask me, what will it take for me to build that. Then they either faint or they think I'm exaggerating. As it is, I'm right in the middle of a new 4Runner build. When I was shopping for it (2020 with 70k miles) my girlfriend wanted to know why I just didn't buy a new one and build that. I showed her how much all the suspension and accessories cost the previous owner. Next I commented on how much he would have saved if he didn't have to pay someone to install all that. At first she didn't believe that he spent close to 20k parts and labor within the last two years. Then we looked up all the parts and I estimated labor cost. Next she wanted to know why he didn't buy cheap parts. My response was pretty much "Buy once, Cry once" Now she understands. Oddly, after all that she still wants me to build her new Land Cruiser.

My ex-wife would ask why I just don't buy a "new" off road vehicle that I don't have to modify my self. She never believed me on the cost and I always told her it was less than I spent.

With Lady Beagle, it's sort of the same. Most often, the parts are purchased and I put them in. Struts, shocks, spark plugs, water pump, radiator, oil change, HVAC fan, what have you.

But she tends to hold little value in my doing these things (with hand tools only and no lift) because she has seen the mechanic at Meineke do it with a lift and air tools, so what's the big deal and why'd I take so long, ha ha

 

[grubworm]

it is an interesting question to ask if something is rude and there are definitely going to be mixed opinions...
the most important thing to ask is: "How am I going to respond to this?"

everyone is so worried now about being offended..."rude" is extremely relative and subjective. in the case of asking the cost of something, it could go many different ways. maybe the person is really interested in what you have and as you are talking about it, they are picturing themselves in your shoes and before they go too far, they are wanting to know if they can even afford it. say I like fishing and want a boat. I'm talking to guy who has a very nice boat and i'm really digging it. he's talking about how much fun he has fishing in it, etc. i'm VERY interested and picturing myself in the boat having fun like he's describing. I know boats are expensive, but I'm really interested and wondering if maybe I can afford it, so ask how much it costs. if it is in line with money that I have, then maybe I will ask more questions and seriously pursue getting one myself now. if the cost is way too much, I can now back off of my excitement a bit and realize it is nice, but out of my reach and I wont be as inquisitive since I know the conversation will now be limited to something I cant afford and participate in.

the real question is: "How does the recipient of the question respond?"
in the case of the imaginary boat I just mentioned, the guy could sense my interest and know that I'm sincerely asking because I'm genuinely wanting one myself. he could just easily tell me roughly the cost and let me do my mental calculations and see if I can afford it. that's why we as humans have vocabulary...to exchange information.
if the guy wants to get offended and take it that I'm asking the cost because somehow in my tricky brain I already know and I think its too much and Im asking the cost in order to embarrass the guy and make him feel a certain way...well, then that's on him. whether or not I meant it to be "rude" is really irrelevant since the recipient gets to decide how they want to take it.

its like my wife and I tell each other...if I say something that can be taken good OR bad...just assume the best and go with that. most of the time its not going to be meant bad and if in the off change it was meant bad...YOU as the recipient of said offense are not automatically obligated to have a response...

when people get "offended", they are basically telling the world that they are so weak and controllable that just a few useless words from a complete stranger can upset them and control them emotionally.

being "offended" makes you a puppet. I know because I used to dearly love pulling people's strings!

 

[MOAK]

it is an interesting question to ask if something is rude and there are definitely going to be mixed opinions...
the most important thing to ask is: "How am I going to respond to this?"

everyone is so worried now about being offended..."rude" is extremely relative and subjective. in the case of asking the cost of something, it could go many different ways. maybe the person is really interested in what you have and as you are talking about it, they are picturing themselves in your shoes and before they go too far, they are wanting to know if they can even afford it. say I like fishing and want a boat. I'm talking to guy who has a very nice boat and i'm really digging it. he's talking about how much fun he has fishing in it, etc. i'm VERY interested and picturing myself in the boat having fun like he's describing. I know boats are expensive, but I'm really interested and wondering if maybe I can afford it, so ask how much it costs. if it is in line with money that I have, then maybe I will ask more questions and seriously pursue getting one myself now. if the cost is way too much, I can now back off of my excitement a bit and realize it is nice, but out of my reach and I wont be as inquisitive since I know the conversation will now be limited to something I cant afford and participate in.

the real question is: "How does the recipient of the question respond?"
in the case of the imaginary boat I just mentioned, the guy could sense my interest and know that I'm sincerely asking because I'm genuinely wanting one myself. he could just easily tell me roughly the cost and let me do my mental calculations and see if I can afford it. that's why we as humans have vocabulary...to exchange information.
if the guy wants to get offended and take it that I'm asking the cost because somehow in my tricky brain I already know and I think its too much and Im asking the cost in order to embarrass the guy and make him feel a certain way...well, then that's on him. whether or not I meant it to be "rude" is really irrelevant since the recipient gets to decide how they want to take it.

its like my wife and I tell each other...if I say something that can be taken good OR bad...just assume the best and go with that. most of the time its not going to be meant bad and if in the off change it was meant bad...YOU as the recipient of said offense are not automatically obligated to have a response...

when people get "offended", they are basically telling the world that they are so weak and controllable that just a few useless words from a complete stranger can upset them and control them emotionally.

being "offended" makes you a puppet. I know because I used to dearly love pulling people's strings!

View attachment 301914

True- I’m never offended at other people being rude. Hells Bells, I’m very rarely offended by anyone or anything as being offended is a complete waste of emotional time. The video presenter opened with “ people ask us all the time, how much did your set up cost” I don’t believe them.

 

[grubworm]

True- I’m never offended at other people being rude. Hells Bells, I’m very rarely offended by anyone or anything as being offended is a complete waste of emotional time. The video presenter opened with “ people ask us all the time, how much did your set up cost” I don’t believe them.

exactly.
there is "righteous indignation" where a person does or says something that is overtly offensive and needs to be called out for it...but even then, the recipient will do better by keeping cool and rational and not letting emotions dictate their response.

it is funny, because i know people who are about money and showing it. one guy I knew, id go to sit on their couch and his wife would run over and move the throw pillow saying how it cost over $100. some people WANT to tell you how much their stuff costs.

people are so different that one size doesn't fit all...what might be rude to one is perfectly fine to another. what should be a boundary to some, is crossed like its nothing by others. I treat people like a video game...i'll play as long as its fun and when its no longer fun, i'll go do something else. why be offended by people I have no control over? walk away and go engage with something that makes you feel good, not drains you